The fact that you don't think so isn't surprising. [ He rolls his eyes, but he's still grinning enough that it's not too deep a jab. ] But a leader should be approachable, right? Not somebody you feel like you can't talk to.
[ Keith rolls his eyes right back, but it's true, so whatever. After a second, he turns his gaze down to his food, stabbing around idly with the fork more than eating. ]
Well... yeah. Yes. And willing to listen. If you don't know the people who work with you, you can't really rely on them.
But... we did okay. And, I mean, if you seemed — shady or untrustworthy or whatever, I wouldn't have taken you guys out to my place at all. Much less out to the caves.
[ Keith is quiet for a moment, surprise registering on his face. The why of it hadn't occurred to him to question until Lance said it out loud. ]
I don't know. Instincts, I guess.
[ His brows knit, and his teeth drag against a rough spot on his lower lip. ]
I didn't know what was gonna go down that night. Some kind of event, or arrival, yeah, but — it could've been anything. All I knew was that I was sure I'd have to handle it alone.
[ Keith wonders what "oh" means, coming from Lance, here. Keith hadn't put a lot of thought into it at the time — hadn't really put thought into it since, either. ]
I didn't think it was like— like destiny or whatever. I mean, maybe it was, but. You all trusted me, even though I probably looked...
[ Keith frowns, running a hand up through his bangs and letting them drop back into his eyes. He doesn't want to say it, but he's self-aware enough to know how it must have seemed — the dropout with an anger management problem, scraping out a living in a run-down shack with a conspiracy corkboard. Hell, he'd set up explosives to distract their teachers. They would have had every reason in the world to think he was unhinged. ]
[ Keith's voice is quiet, patient, and resigned to his eternal bewilderment. He still can't comprehend the entirety of whatever Lance's thing with him was. Is. If Keith had recognized him right away, would things have gone differently between them? He can't even imagine what that would be like.
But he gets it. He gets how it feels when someone looks at you and only sees the parts of you that you desperately wish could be different, or hidden, or better. He hadn't meant to make Lance feel like that, but he also knows that doesn't matter. The thoughtlessness of it was probably worse.
Keith picks at the rim of his drink with the callused pad of his thumb, feeling all out of sorts and not at all like he's "hanging out" properly. ]
I wasn't the kind of guy you should've been trying to impress back then anyway.
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That, we can agree on.
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Sooo, what have you been up to? I feel like I've barely seen you around all month.
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Working. Or exploring. I don't... really like hanging around with nothing to do.
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[ He waves a hand generally, hoping Lance gets what he means — Team Voltron. ]
Again. Not yet, anyway.
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Yeah, I get that. It's weird, thinking about having any kind of boss that isn't, y'know, Allura or Shiro.
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[ There's a reluctant pause, like offering more is damning, somehow, but... well, Lance already knows what happened to him. ]
They're good. A lot better than the officers back at the Garrison.
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Well... yeah. Yes. And willing to listen. If you don't know the people who work with you, you can't really rely on them.
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[ Keith snorts, but he glances over at Lance. ]
But... we did okay. And, I mean, if you seemed — shady or untrustworthy or whatever, I wouldn't have taken you guys out to my place at all. Much less out to the caves.
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I don't know. Instincts, I guess.
[ His brows knit, and his teeth drag against a rough spot on his lower lip. ]
I didn't know what was gonna go down that night. Some kind of event, or arrival, yeah, but — it could've been anything. All I knew was that I was sure I'd have to handle it alone.
And then I didn't.
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[ Lance really wasn't sure what he expected, but hat certainly wasn't it. ]
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I didn't think it was like— like destiny or whatever. I mean, maybe it was, but. You all trusted me, even though I probably looked...
[ Keith frowns, running a hand up through his bangs and letting them drop back into his eyes. He doesn't want to say it, but he's self-aware enough to know how it must have seemed — the dropout with an anger management problem, scraping out a living in a run-down shack with a conspiracy corkboard. Hell, he'd set up explosives to distract their teachers. They would have had every reason in the world to think he was unhinged. ]
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[ It's weird, thinking back now, to how Keith's weird conspiracy shack was the least weird part of his last 24 hours on Earth.
Keith's explosives were and still are a little concerning, though. ]
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... and hey, besides, I did remember you. It just took me a second.
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[ Keith's voice is quiet, patient, and resigned to his eternal bewilderment. He still can't comprehend the entirety of whatever Lance's thing with him was. Is. If Keith had recognized him right away, would things have gone differently between them? He can't even imagine what that would be like.
But he gets it. He gets how it feels when someone looks at you and only sees the parts of you that you desperately wish could be different, or hidden, or better. He hadn't meant to make Lance feel like that, but he also knows that doesn't matter. The thoughtlessness of it was probably worse.
Keith picks at the rim of his drink with the callused pad of his thumb, feeling all out of sorts and not at all like he's "hanging out" properly. ]
I wasn't the kind of guy you should've been trying to impress back then anyway.
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